Is There a Stop Button for Life? Without relying on any external forces.
On a Saturday evening, I was strolling down the street with my partner when I received a call from my dad: “Your grandmother isn’t doing well. I’m taking leave tomorrow to visit her.” Later that night, my mom also tried to video call me. My phone was on silent, and by the time I noticed the missed call, it was almost 11 PM. When I called back, she didn’t answer.
I dread those few seconds of silence before my parents speak when they call me—it often signals that they’re about to share some unwelcome news. The weight of those moments is palpable, and I’ve received several such calls before. Each time, I’m left at a loss for how to respond.
This time, it was about my grandmother. Strangely, my heart didn’t churn with the usual turmoil, mainly for two reasons: first, my grandmother had been ill for a long time and was already 89 years old; second, I’ve experienced far more sorrowful events, and my interactions with her had been limited.
If the World Were an Animal
I once compared our lives to the process of digestion, with the world as the animal. Whether we’re apples, rice, eggs, beef, water, or anything else, our birth is like entering the mouth of society. We’re broken down, absorbed, and our inherent value is extracted. When we’re deemed worthless, we’re expelled from this societal body.
And just like that, our lives come to an end. But what choices do we have in this process? Upon reflection, quite a few. From the moment we enter the mouth, we can choose to cling to society’s front teeth, or become a fishbone stuck in its gums. Once in the stomach, if it’s unbearable, we might turn into watermelon or scalding hotpot oil to hasten the end of this painful ordeal. Or, adopting a sacrificial approach, we could become sickly sweet beverages, giving our all to inflict ailments like diabetes upon this societal organism…
Of course, these are just fantasies. More often than not, we have no say in what we become. Sometimes, society might not even want to consume us—most “food” is stripped of nutrients and expelled without exception. The silver lining is that whatever consumes us has its own life cycle—it too will fall ill, die, decompose, and be absorbed. After we’re expelled, though our nutrients are gone (nutrients being relative to the society that digested us), we’re actually returning to—or entering—a vaster world, where life continues endlessly.
If this is the truth of life, how should we choose to live? Different people will offer different answers, some of which may work temporarily. Transforming ourselves into toxins might seem impactful, but from the perspective of our ecosystem, the effect is often negligible.
Perhaps the most optimistic attitude is to view this digestive process as a journey. Actively explore, observe, and marvel at the exquisite world our lives create and sustain. Alternatively, quietly completing this journey without overthinking is also a perfectly valid choice.
The Love of Parents
This article has taken so long to finish that I’ve forgotten what this subheading was meant to convey.
Alas!